Staying in love

Thursday 27 November 2014

Everyone always talks about how romantic it is to fall in love. Romance movies show lovers meeting and relationships blossoming but, I'm confused. When did that become the best part of a relationship?

Don't get me wrong, I understand the appeal of the starting something new. The shy smiles, cheeky texts and fantasising about that first kiss, but what about the nerves? The wondering if you'll hear from him/her? The awkwardness of your first "sleepover"? The awkwardness of the morning after your first sleepover? Developing the balance between him/her and everything else in your life when you're so excited that want to spend every second together? For me, it all sounds a little stressful.

But then, give or take a few minor blips (we met at 18 - what do you expect), I've been happily coupled up for nearly ten years now. (Maybe I've forgotten something about new romances?) Despite this considerable achievement, every time I watch a film dedicated to celebrating those new couples. I feel a little cheated. Surely the lifers are the real achievers?

To fall in love and stay in love. That's the real miracle.

Through arguments, money worries, the death of old fashioned romance, work stress and everything else that life throws at you, to keep on loving someone with every piece of your heart. That's pretty spectacular.

It's rare I get whisked off for a surprise date these days and yeah, he farts, burps and some days drives me nuts. Today I came home ready to serve him stew for tea. It took me a while to sort last night, it cooked all day and yesterday he liked stew. Today, he hated it and fancied sausages and mash instead. It's like having a child. But even when he's fickle he makes me smile. And yes, he ate the stew.

But he's still the most thoughtful, romantic man I know. He scrubs the frost off my windscreen when he's already late for work, he brings home flowers for no reason, he washes the pots before I get home so I come back to a tidy house. What about that isn't movie worthy? Because I'd take that kind of romance over any other, every time.

So, Hollywood, give me a shout before your next attempt at romance. I'll happily consult. Let's hear it for all the couples for a change :)