Still waiting for the glow to show

Tuesday 04 August 2015

Today I realised how long it had been since I last scribbled something down blog-wise. Eight (ish) weeks! Yikes. How time flies when you’re… Getting old? Busy? *INSERT APPROPRIATE EXCUSE HERE*

Part of me had wanted to follow my last soppy scrawl with some kind of rage fuelled marital with @markfletcheruk, you know, to offer a bit of balance to my blog. But (happily) I’m still waiting for said marital to happen.

To a casual observer it may seem like the last few weeks haven’t particularly done much to inspire me. When actually, that’s just not true.

For a good few weeks I have had horrific writers block. I’m 99% sure it came from not being able to write about the one thing in the world that I actually wanted to write about! Something that has distracted me so much that every time I’ve even attempted to push it aside and start writing a blog moaning about Amazon, reviewing a movie or laying into some Russell Brand Tunisia reaction ridiculousness, I’ve ended up typing complete bollocks.

So what is this amazing news that has kept me so quiet? Well… I’ve oversold it to the point I can’t even manage to type it now. But you know what they say, a picture is worth a thousand words:

Yup! Since last August – we’ve managed to squeeze a whole hell of a lot in to a year! Buying our first house, getting married, and now, the hubby and I are expecting our first little miracle.

Now before I glaze over my first trimester experience, I’d just like to make something clear… I’m not naïve enough to think that I am the first woman to discover the trials and tribulations of the early weeks of pregnancy. However, as this is my first pregnancy, it’s all been a bit of an education…

The secret keeping, making excuses about not drinking, plastering on a strained smile when all you can think is “Please don’t let me throw up at work”, crying at tv adverts, programmes, movies, the dog falling off the sofa everything and the constant battle to keep your eyes open as you fight physical and emotional exhaustion.

My reality has been sleeping with the hum of a fan every night or ordering a pint glass full of ice to take to my room when I stay away with work because I’m permanently boiling. It is struggling to get out of bed every morning because it feels like I’ll vomit if I stand. It is (already!) not managing to sleep through the night because I can’t go long enough without desperately needing to pee!! It is abandoning my favourite foods because they make me poorly, or worse, packing my new favourite foods for lunch then just four hours later opening my lunch box and not even being able to think about eating them without feeling ill. It’s getting in my car and feeling my sleepy eyes get heavy. It’s suffering through hayfever season without medication and giving up Mr Whipee ice cream in summer.

But (and here is why us ladies rock) despite all of the above I still manage to be as excited as a kid at Christmas on a daily basis. Despite all of the above – and more, which I’ll keep to myself – I manage to climb out of bed, eat breakfast, shower, walk the dog and be productive at work. Naturally I’ve yanked bed time forward a couple of hours but every time I tell someone our news, or drift off into a baby day dream I can’t help but want to let out a little excited squeal. All this, even after opting to watch my first ever episode of one born every minute and knowing full well what I can expect in a few months time. Yikes!

Like I say, us ladies rock!